I know everyone has some amount of anxiety that they have to deal with, but I’ve always felt that I have at least slightly elevated levels of anxiety compared to the norm. For as long as I can remember, if something made me even just a little nervous I would just keeping thinking about whatever it was and basically turn into a basket-case. I’ve tried dealing with my anxiety on my own as best as I could, and I’ve been able to get through every situation thrown at me so far. Just because I got through it though doesn’t mean I was enjoying myself.
There are certain times when my anxiety has been almost unbearable. For example, if I was competing for anything I would have to make multiple trips to the bathroom. It became part of my preparation ritual. I also cannot stand when I procrastinate on projects or chores that need to be done by a certain time or done every so often. If I do, then the more time I let pass, the more agitated I become. In extreme cases I even feel like I’m hyperventilating.
When I was heavily pregnant with Andrew there were certain chores I wasn’t able to do anymore. Bending over was nearly impossible so I couldn’t clean up the dog poo in the backyard. I couldn’t carry the vacuum upstairs while maintaining balance, so I only vacuumed half of the house. I couldn’t clean the tub because the smell of the chemicals in the bathtub cleaner would make me cough too much. Those chores still needed to be done, so my husband had to pick up the slack.
Unfortunately for him, I have anxiety. I would let him know what had to be done, but he doesn’t have the same sense of urgency as I do so chores weren’t completed when I wanted them to be. He would say things like, “You’re not going to die if it doesn’t get done right now.” While I know that was obviously true, part of me still felt like it would be a tragedy if even one household chore didn’t get done. My solution to trying to get Anthony to do chores when I wanted them done was to nag him.
Nagging doesn’t work.
No one likes to be nagged. While there are some people out there who probably enjoy nagging someone, if you’re like me then you just feel like a jerk even as the words are coming out of your mouth. Even the word nag doesn’t sound pleasant.
I promise you I didn’t mean to turn into the nagging wife, but that’s exactly what happened. My anxiety has caused me to be a control freak. So when I wasn’t able to do the things I used to, I needed to find another way to control what was happening. Nagging caused tempers to flare in my house, but I just couldn’t let anything go. My husband would probably tell you I wasn’t all that bad, but he’s a very understanding and forgiving person when it comes to me.
Now that I am no longer pregnant, I can go back to doing all the things I used to be able to. I feel so much better being able to get chores done when I feel they need to be done. Unfortunately, the nagging became a bit of a habit. It’s a habit I’m trying to break, but it’s taking some time. If I slip up and start nagging for whatever reason, as soon as I realize it, I apologize.
I’m sure you will read another post about my nagging one day, but hopefully it will be about the fact that I finally kicked the habit. If not, then just remember that I’m only human and everyone nags somebody sometimes. If your trying to stop nagging too or trying to break another bad habit, then be proud of yourself. You are trying to make yourself a better person. That is something that not only you, but everyone who surrounds you benefits from.